Update: 8 Weeks 5 Days

Sprout at 8 weeks 1 Day

I'm a little delayed with updating but SO much has happened since my last post. Soooo much!

 

1. I was called for an interview (11/15) and it went really well. BUT....also in the same week my boss announced he is leaving so that means a BIG promotion for me with an increase in pay. Once I weighed all the pros & cons {and after researching the government agency I interviewed for} I came to the conclusion that it's in my best interest all around to stay put. At least for now. Yes, the new job would offer more money but my current job offers ALL the other perks of being a loyal employee for the past 7 years. Annnnd no worries about fmla, sick leave, vacation time, slacking because I'm preggers, stability and most importantly I know the culture here. I know the folks I work with and I know my job is safe. Nothing like the devil you know, huh? lol With the change in leadership I'm now second in command. I won't reveal the line of work I'm in because it will surely uncover my identity but second in command is a great place to be at this stage of my life and my career. I look at it as a blessing.

 

Soooooooooo.....on to the baby stuff!

 

I had my 1st OB appointment on my birthday, 11/22! I was officially 8 weeks 1 day. I was so nervous. I guess because the last time we actually saw the baby was during the 5 week 6 day ultrasound. I just prayed everything would be okay. Meaning there was still a heartbeat, since the last time we only saw it we didn't get to hear it since it was so early. The baby measured 8 weeks 3 days, 2 days ahead, and had a strong heartbeat. Yay!! Also the highlight of the visit was having an abdominal ultrasound and not an internal vaginal one. Double Yayyyyy! Now for the low-lights of that visit. I had to get a pelvic exam. Yes, with the speculum. Ugh! It was so painful. I thought I was bleeding! It felt like she was pushing a razor blade inside me. I'm so thankful I don't have to go thru that anytime soon. Prayerfully. My blood pressure was really high but I already knew it would be. I'm going to ask them if they can start taking my pressure at the end of my visit instead of as soon as I come in. I will continue to have high readings if they keep doing it first. I always have high readings during my OB/GYN appointments! They are a source of anxiety for me. Have any of you experienced this? Crazy thing is my pressure is always normal at my primary care and foot doctors offices. lol

 

She gave me a bunch of paperwork and answered all my questions. She also left my due date as July 03, 2014. I contacted the genetics department and I'm scheduled for the MaterniT21 test on December 13th. I will be 11 weeks 1 day. I'm not sure if I'm going to have the NT scan. I was thinking of having it done after I get the results of my genetics test JUST for the extra peek at the baby. But again, I'm not sure. All these appointments are kinda overwhelming so I'm just gonna take it one step at a time. I actually didn't realize how overwhelming it all was until this appointment. So many test, appointments, bloodwork etc! I just told myself I'm not focusing on 40 weeks. It's too much for me right now. I will only focus on day by day...week by week. That will keep me sane. So right now my eyes are on 13 weeks. That's my goal for right now. Then after that I will re-shift my focus.

 

I'm still feeling realllly good! Still no morning/evening sickness. I'm still feeling pretty tired but I feel like it's getting better. The only new thing I'm experiencing is hip pain when I'm sleeping. I have to constantly rotate positions at night because my hips hurt! I will be 9 weeks on Thursday so my wife advised me to go grab the body pillow from the basement. I'm so glad she's already gone thru this process!

 

We have told our families and most of our friends. Most folks didn't believe me/us. I still think they all assume I'm joking. Lol! They never thought I would actually go thru with it. Once I start showing I think it will become real to them. I'm still getting the, "I'm still in shock about your pregnancy and I don't believe you!" text messages! Lmao!

 

Please pray that my genetics testing comes back fine, my pregnancy continues to be uneventful & boring & that I continue to remain positive and healthy.

 

Meditation

 

Don't worry, Pray.

The Baby is fine. And so are you.

Enjoy the journey.

The Belly: 7 weeks 0 days & Living a Lie.

So...today we are officially 7 weeks pregnant! Whoohooo! This is the belly. I had to crop out the huge boobs and the pubic region but I think you get the overall picture. lol I have a stomach. I've never had one. This is allllll new to me. See those pronounced stretch-marks?? *faints* I'm not showing thru my shirts but I am no longer able to button my work pants all the way.

 

I will see the OB on next Friday, my birthday and I've decided to tell my mom & our families on that day. I was going to wait until after the NT scan & genetic testing but I must admit....keeping this secret makes me sad at times. It's weird but it does make me feel...sad and borderline depressed! I mean.....let me explain. I'm tired. I'm almost always sleepy...my shirts don't really fit the way they used to, I don't have the energy I used to, I'm sure I put on a few pounds and I feel like I'm living a lie. A BIG one. Something I'm not good at. So, because of this I've turned down invitations to "meet up" with friends, stayed away from my family and I've just been in the house with my wife and Baby C. When I have met up with friends or been around my family I'm praying the whole time they don't notice or say anything about how I "look." I guess I'm just super paranoid. *shrugs* Keeping secrets will do that to you. lol

 

I feel fragile. I feel vulnerable. BUT I also feel so very protective over this baby. I feel like I should be getting as much rest as possible and making sure I take it easy during these next few weeks. I wanted to wait until I knew everything is okay before telling people but I've just accepted the fact that things can change during pregnancy at ANY moment AND during ANY trimester. Not telling people won't keep bad things away and telling them won't bring bad things to be. Period.

So, I decided that I will be comfortable telling family on my birthday, 11-22. My wife has respected my decision not to tell folks until I'm ready. Tho I'm sure she's bursting out the seams to tell the world! lol Thanks Baby :-) We won't post on FB until 12 weeks so if you're my FB friend please don't mention it. Thanks!

 

I was telling my wife that I admire women who can yell, "I'M PREGNANT" from the hilltops the moment they get their BFP! As soon as those two-pink lines appear they are making phone calls and telling the world! I really admire that fearlessness! They don't wait for BETA results (most don't know what a BETA test is..), they don't wait for the first doctors appointment or first ultrasound, they don't wait to hear the heartbeat.........they just announce!!! Damn THAT'S Gangsta!!!

 

Here I am at 7 weeks and my only real symptom's are sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeepy & sore boobs. I do continue to have moments of nausea and sickness but it's bearable. I haven't experienced bad morning sickness and I'm thankful. I mean, I did pray so hard to not have it or at least not as bad.  I know it's still early but I'm thankful to have made it to this point without it. I've had it relatively easy so far during this pregnancy and I'm really excited and nervous about my first OB appointment.

 

I'm craving all salty, spicy, starchy foods! Hot sauce on chips, loaded baked potatoes, jalapenos, breads etc! I'm not really feeling sweets these days. Oh, we did the baking soda gender test and the fizzy results were boy. lol The Chinese gender thingy also said "boy"...We will see in a few weeks how accurate they both are. lol That's all for now.........Have a great weekend everyone!

 

Meditation

Everything will be alright.

Pray more and worry not.

The baby is fine.......enjoy your journey.

Milestones: 5 Weeks 6 Days

Today we went in for my weekly ultrasound. Exactly 5 weeks 6 days. The Doctor that did my vag/ultrasound was so rough. Ugh! Damn her! Anyway....we saw the fetal pole and also the little flicker of the heartbeat. Thank God. Although we didn't get to hear the heartbeat I was okay with it because I know it's still early. My wife was like, "I see it!" I had to hold still and was instructed not to breathe. lol

 

Sprout has grown A LOT since my first ultrasound. The next time we will see him/her will be at my first OB appointment which is November 22nd. My 37th Birthday.Yippee! We are both really excited about this appointment JUST to see the look on our OB's face when she walks into the exam room and it's ME hopping on the table. lol We love her.

 

So far I'm still feeling really great. No food aversions. No morning sickness and no real feelings of being pregnant. The only thing I'm experiencing is moments of nausea and very tender boobs, Oh and I'm so damn sleeeeeepy after I eat my lunch and in the evenings. So far so good and I'm not complaining one bit. I know it may hit me at any moment and it usually doesn't set in until after 6 weeks but I'm just appreciating each day that I escape morning/Evening/All day sickness. I'm also doing well with the pro.gesterone suppositories. Other than being an extra step in my night-time routine....its not as bad as I thought it would be.

 

My boobs are getting fuller and my shirts are starting to fit kinda awkward. I mean, I'm not showing yet but I can tell my stomach is expanding because I can see the imprint of my boxers elastic line around my stomach. Yes, I wear boxers. And UGHHH to them fitting the way they do these days. lol This journey is indeed going to be special. lol

 

 

Meditations

6 weeks 0 days tomorrow!

Surrender this pregnancy....God is in Control.

No amount of worry will change the outcome BUT prayer can. Focus on that.

Embrace & celebrate each day you're pregnant.

5 Weeks 0 Days - Meet Sprout!

Today we had our first ultrasound. According to my calculations I'm 4 weeks 6 days but per the RE I'm 5 weeks exactly. So we only have one day difference. Yay! I'm sure my OB will go by my last period so it doesn't matter anyway.

 

My wife, Baby C and I went to this very special appointment. My nerves didn't kick in until we were actually in the waiting room. Then they called my name. I just kept praying for there to be something on the screen. I haven't had a beta blood test since last Friday, October 25th and I found myself thinking all sorts of things. I tried my best to just remain calm and keep telling myself, "C, this is all out of your control and out of your hands." All I know is....I've been doing all I can humanly do to give this little life the best start. Prenatal vitamins, rest, positive meditation, healthy diet etc....and that's really all I can do.

 

Back to my appointment - The RE does some calculations for my due date and then grabs the "dildo cam" {A term one of my blog readers/secret group members introduced me to. Ha!}. As soon as it's in she says, "Ahhhh we definitely have a pregnancy here!" She continues to say how everything looks perfect and some other stuff but at that point I zoned out and was just looking at the screen crying. It was so emotional for me. My wife was paying attention I'm sure. She was showing Baby C the screen saying, "Look at your brother or Sissy!"

 

She gave us some pictures of our little Sprout and handed me some early pregnancy paperwork to read over. She also told me to schedule an appointment with our OB in the next few weeks. I will go back for one, maybe 2 more ultrasounds before she releases me. I just still cannot believe this! Like, there is a baby in my belly and I have the pictures to prove it! I'm looking forward to next week to prayerfully see/hear Sprouts heartbeat.

 

I'm still feeling really well. I have times when my stomach feels a little sick but other than that I'm fine. I do get really tired after lunch and sometimes when I get home from work but I really feel good. Oh, and I've decided to not get on the scale until after delivery lol. I just can't bring myself to see that number increasing. When I get weighed in at the doctor's office I will just tell them to not tell me the number and I will close my eyes when I step up on there. Smh lol

 

I'm just so truly thankful. God is Good.

 

Have a safe and Happy Halloween everyone!!!!!!!

Final Beta Results! 4weeks 1 day

I can hardly type this because I'm so excited! I can tell you one thing, while I do pray on the regular outside of being pregnant...I've found myself praying extra hard these past few days. Really hard. Mainly because long before we actually started trying, well... back when my wife was going thru this process with Baby C, TTC showed me just how NOT in control of life we actually are. No matter how much we plan, time insems or anything else. I have to just trust and lean on God that everything will all work out and I will have a happy & healthy 9 months. I have to trust that because if not this process will literally drive me crazy mentally, emotionally and physically.

 

Here are the Results:

 

1st Beta (October 21st, 2013)

 

HCG - 50.7

Progesterone  - 13.5

 

*Due to low progesterone I was instructed to increase from one suppository to 2 at bedtime.*

 

2nd Beta (October 23rd, 2013)

 

HCG - 158

Progesterone  - 18

 

3rd *And Final Beta* (October 25th, 2013)

 

HCG - 418!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Progesterone - Nurse just said "almost 20" So I'm assuming 19 something

 

We are scheduled for our first ultrasound on next Wednesday! I have been experiencing waves of nausea since 3weeks preggers. It is progressively getting worse. Especially on my ride to work in the morning. It's not horrible just yet but I will be dusting off the seabands and keeping some crackers nearby just in case. The only symptom so far is extreme fatigue. I could literally sleep the day away while watching the Halloween Movie marathons that are on these days. Other than that I'm feeling well and just trying to eat healthy and REST. Grow Sprout GROW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Thank. You. Lord.

 

....And thank all of you for the messages and well wishes. I'm still struggling a little with BFP guilt but I continue to pray for all of you out there still waiting for that magical moment.

The Results are in.....the TWW is Over!

BFP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! On the FIRST Try!

 

I'm still in shock and I thank God. My eggs aren't scrambled afterall! I was mentally prepared for it not to work the first time and even told myself getting pregnant on the 1st try was really unrealistic. At 36 soon to be 37 in November I successfully got pregnant on the first try with no meds & no monitoring. God is Good.

 

Here's how it went down

 

So, you all know I started taking the pro.gesterone suppositories at 3dpo. I felt like we had perfect timing for our insems. We did our inseminations on CD12 (we received the first smiley at 8:30pm on CD12), CD13 & CD14. One at 5pm and the other 2 around 8pm-9pm.

 

I did document "symptoms" but I really thought what little symptoms I did have were all due to the progesterone. I was bummed because I didn't feel pregnant. There were a few that stood out tho....

1. Neon Yellow Urine

2. Bleeding Gums (I had it one morning then it stopped)

3. NO cervical mucus

4. A little bloody ewcm on 8dpo

5. A LOT of ewcm at 9dpo (I never have ewcm this late in my cycle)

6. Constant Dreaming!!!! OMG!

7. This may be TMI but.... at 10dpo I had an orgasm in my sleep. Yep. Weird.

8. Very very very emotional

9. Sleepy alllllll of the time.

10. The smell of my coffee almost made me gag. I LOVE coffee.

 

Again....these were the ones that stood out as "maybe" it worked BUT I felt fine otherwise. There were a few moments of me feeling kinda "sick" but with the pro.gesterone I really thought it was because of that. I was actually getting sad close to test day because I thought for sure I would be feeling different and I really didn't. Plus when I read about so many women having increased creamy cm and I had literally NONE I thought for sure I was out. My wife pointed out that she suspected something when I was always sleep for the 11pm news. This is HUGE because I watch the news every night. But the days leading up to test day I crashed by 10pm at the latest.

 

TEST DAY

Then came test day.... I woke up on 11dpo and took a First Response HPT. My wife and I decided to wait to test and 11dpo was the date we selected. At 5am the test was negative. Stark white. Nothing. I was ok...my wife was very sad. Which in turn made me sad. I told her I wanted to stop the progesterone to allow my cycle to start. If I wasn't pregnant no sense in dealing with them another day and delaying our next attempt. She told me to call the nurse when the fertility clinic opened at 9am. I did. I told the nurse I took a pregnancy test at 5am and it was negative and asked her if I should stop taking the progesterone or wait until 14dpo like my Doctor instructed. Mind you...I was supposed to come on the next day at 12dpo so I told her I know my test would be positive by now because I'm supposed to come on tomorrow. She said, "Keep taking the progesterone. It's still early. You've added progesterone to the mix and that could change things. So, wait a few more days and you may be calling me back with good news." I thought....yeah right.

 

I went to the dollar store at 11:30am to pick up more tests. I felt like we had better luck with those test when my wife was preggers. She got her BFP at 9dpo. I stopped for lunch and headed back to the job. I looked at the test and thought..."let me just take one now. I'm sure it will be negative but oh well..." I went to the bathroom at work and took the test. I brought the test to my desk. Gross, I know, but I used antibacterial wipes. Whatever. I let the test sit and I looked at it and thought I was seeing things. This was at 12noon. I used the flashlight on my iphone and instantly started shaking. I called my wife and could hardly get the words out. I said, "BABY!!!!!! OMG! I THINK I SEE SOMETHING ON THE TEST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" It was faint. But there was a line. I snapped a pic and sent it to her phone.

Immediately she responded, "I see it too OMG!!!!!!!!!"

 

I sent the pic to a dear friend of ours who is like family because she was soooo instrumental in our TTC journey with #1, Baby girl.... I sent it to her because I just knew it was an evap line. There was just no way. I've never seen an evap line so I really just wanted to make sure this wasn't it! She replied back, "HOLY SHYT! That's NO evap line it has color!! You're preggers!!!!" I just sat there in shock and still not believing what had just happened.

 

I just knew when I woke up at 7am the next morning it would be gone. But it wasn't. It was still there and I was thankful beyond words that it was.

 

Guilt

There was a part of me that felt kinda guilty. Guilty that some women have to endure months even years to get pregnant. They have to endure all kinds of tests and medication. And sometimes it still doesn't happen for them. Like, I feel so blessed that I didn't have to go thru any of that. I just thank God for everything. I said a silent prayer for those women I know who are going thru this. Praying they get their BFP soon. Praying they get to experience this moment and this feeling.

 

My first BETA was this morning and the numbers was: 50.7 HCG

Here is a quote from my Blog Dated 07-29-13: "Mark this day......7-29-13.....something tells me I'm gonna get pregnant the first try, or at max 3. I don't know what it is...but something internal tells me that it's gonna happen pretty quickly for me. It makes me excited and nervous at the SAME DAMN TIME! If it's gonna happen fast I would rather it happen first try....reason being, I'm not planning on telling family and friends until after our NT scan...which will put us in January. My moms birthday is the 11th so it would be a really nice birthday gift for her. But we shall see."

Thank. You. Lord.

Please continue to send prayer, positive energy, light and sticky baby dust our way. It really is appreciated and felt.

 

TTC: One down. Things you MUST consider during insems!

Yesterday was CD12. I started testing at CD7. All negative. While at work yesterday I called my wife and told her my morning and my afternoon opks were both negative but I felt something was happening or about to happen in baby making region. We went back and forth a little bit as to whether or not we should do an insem or not even though I didn't have a smiley yet. We decided to just go for it.....we figured, what the heck?!

 

I came home and got myself together. We contacted the donor and then waited. Less than an hour after speaking with him, the doorbell was ringing. We all sat around for a bit catching up and sharing a few laughs about us being "here" again and then I went to the bathroom. {TMI} Different from earlier in the day I had some tacky stretchy but clearish cervical fluid. I immediately said to myself, "yeah...I'm glad we decided to do this tonight because something is indeed about to happen." I told my wife to get the preseed so I could insert it while we were all sitting around talking. Then I went back to our bedroom.

 

I said a little prayer and then my wife and Baby C came into the bedroom. We kissed each other...Baby C rubbed my belly for good luck baby dust and then my wife took the donor all his "products." He did his duty...he called out to my wife, "Special delivery" lol...and then she went to put Baby C in her crib and get the goods. I could tell she was nervous but she did great! She was very gentle and all I remember thinking was, "Lord, Thy Will Be done." 

 

Here's the funny part (close your ears kids)........after all the goods were inside of me, I was like, "You know what comes next"...I said... "I wanna feel you on me so I can........y'all know.......lol She went to straddle me and I suddenly blocked my woman region with my hand like "Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo wayment!! Are you ovulating too!?! Get Offffaaaa me before we BOTH end up pregnant!!" Ahahahahahaaaaaa! Pure Lesbian comedy. Anyway, we made skin contact (away from her woman region)...I released....we wanted to make sure to get the swimmers up there. Afterwards I put my legs up for about 15mintes. We had already put the instead cup in so things were nice and capped off. My wife went back into the living room and her and the donor chatted a bit more then he left. We inseminated at 5pm.

 

I decided to do another opk at at 8:30PM just to check to see if there were any changes since my 1pm test and WE GOT A SMILEY!!!!!!!!!! All I remember is gasping for breath and yelling out to my wife! She was like, "what's wrong!?" I said..."the test is positive! We got a smiley!!" Her reply, "Oh MY GAWD!!" lol

 

Here is a screenshot from my iperiod app from yesterday. lol I'm so thankful I started testing early AND that I tested twice per day instead of once!

 

 

So......one insem down and two more to go! Then we are off to the land of the TWW! I will start my pro.gesterone on Thursday. Please send us BLUE sticky baby dust!